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Good day.
It has come to my attention that the latest issue of Broomsticks and Cauldrons - a publication which continues, against all odds and editorial restraint, to exist - has found its way into your hands. One might reasonably ask why. Perhaps you seek knowledge. Perhaps you are merely curious. Or perhaps, most concerning of all, you believe yourself to be a practitioner of the arcane arts.
Whatever the case, and as Miss Tick has stepped away from her desk, it is my duty - as it so often is - to remind you that magic, …
Right, listen up, ye fine broom-ridin' bonnie bunch! 'Tis yer wee pal Rob Anybody 'ere, scribblin' this missive wi' the grace o' a hedgehog on roller skates an' the spelling skills o' a ship wi' a quill (an' believe me, we tried that once - dinnae ask). Now then, we've got tales tae tell, spells tae sling, an' a sale on cauldrons big enough tae fit a ship, if ye're daft enough tae try cookin' one whole - not that we'd recommend it, mind, unless the ship deserved …
Roll up, roll up! Fresh off the back of a donkey and only slightly cursed - Broomsticks and Cauldrons, the finest (and only!) magical newsletter this side of the Shades! Perfect for witches, wizzards, or anyone what's ever shouted at a teacup!
Only five dollars,1 a lock of hair, and one minor soul promise! Comes pre-hexed and wrapped in ethically questionable parchment. Smells faintly of regret.
From the desk of Miss Perspicacia Tick, with the help of C.M.O.T Dibbler, included in this issue:
Greetings from the desk of Miss Perspicacia Tick.
Whether you're steeping herbs in the Ramtops, sidestepping curses in Ankh-Morpork, or simply trying not to wake the household spirits - welcome to another issue of Broomsticks and Cauldrons.
This compact conjuring of news and nonsense is for witches, wizards, and the less magically minded. Expect curious updates, a sprinkle of wisdom, and the occasional spell you didn't ask for but probably need.
So, grab your pointy hat, polish your boots, and try not to anger any eldritch entities - it's time to dive into the news that …
Greetings from the desk of Miss Perspicacia Tick.
Whether you're sipping scumble1 in Lancre, dodging assassins in Ankh-Morpork, or just trying not to fall off the edge of the world, welcome to another issue of Broomsticks and Cauldrons2
This modest missive of magic, mischief, and mildly alarming metaphysics is for witches of all stages (from full coven to solitary kettle-simmerers) and anyone else willing to cross into the realm of practical wisdom, magical oddments, updates from the wild broom-paths, and happy for a dash of advice you didn't ask for, but very likely need.
So, …
